Patriarchy has killed me

So, it all started with a challenge, I challenged my friend that we will have to walk all the way from kurla to govandi and reach before midnight and he agreed. We were walking, talking, running and joking around and having a gala time and we reach almost till chembur which is filed with all the ‘taporis’ or ‘awaara’ boys. So, we were just discussing about review of section 377 and other stuff, I find three boys on scooter who were staring at me and I just ignored they went ahead and stopped and started whistling and I turned back they were calling me but I didn’t go. My friend went to them and was talking so I thought maybe they are his friends and they must be asking him why are you walking with him? Who is he? And I started walking ahead so that they don’t ask him anymore questions, my friend joins me again and we walk ahead and I kept asking him same question but he asked me to ignore it and walk. There these boys come again and start touching me and force me to ride on a sc

So, on 24 th January a friend of mine asked me to come for an interview by Bombay Times at Churchgate and we reach there on time though we couldn’t find the venue so soon we all were frustrated and irritated as well. Along me with me and my friend there were some heterosexual girls and lesbians who were asked to come for the interview by an admin of a LGBT page in Mumbai. So, after a while we reach the venue and see the journalist greeting us nicely and busy shooting other people who were present. Later journalist describes us their idea that they need us to dress in pop colours so that could make the picture look more impactful and we asked her to give some time to think about it! We disagreed to their plan and decided to tell them no and leave, but when she approached us for shoot we talked to her and told her that the impact she wants to create through the wouldn’t work because it’s very stereotypical and wouldn’t do much for the community’s welfare, her idea basically was

“Traditionally, exchange of haldi kunku between married women marks a symbol of having a happy married life. :) Does that mean others shouldn't have a happy life? We need to be considerate of human beings who feel like having such beautiful moments to celebrate and enjoy. Personally, I always felt left out whenever there was haldi kunku at my home or my friend's home. And I strongly feel this celebration should not be limited to just married women. Why not celebrate happiness of every human being? Why not spread love and joy to all? Hence, this decision of having a small homely occasion customised to spread love and joy for all the people who wants to be a part of it.” This was the exact message I received from my trans sister Nishtha and that’s it I was excited to attend a haldi kunku which smashed all barriers of gender, cast, race, sex, marital status for the first time may be. Idea of Haldi kunku has always fascinated me, draping the new traditional saree